Compostulating With The Times

Thursday, November 18, 2010

The Clampers

or, how to piss off your horse, without even trying.

GRIP with your upper legs, tighten your clenched knees inwards, and guess what happens? Just guess, go on, I dare ya.

The horse, feeling this constant squeezing on his back and sides, tunes you out, or runs away. A lot. Try to imagine yourself backing into a corner. What happens to your shoulders? They round inward. Keep backing. Hurts your hips, doesn't it? That's what you do to a horse's back, when you clamp with your legs.

How can he move normally with you clamped like a giant clothespin up there? He can't. PERIOD. He can't feel any aid given, as he's been numbed to any sensation from his rider. How will he feel a slight increase/decrease in leg pressure, if all he ever feels is constant pressure??

Loosen your legs, let them stretch/flop down his sides. Try to touch the ground with your heel, then your toe, then your heel again. The weight of your legs and your body keeps you on the horse's back. Gripping with your legs pops you OFF his back.

Do NOT be a clothespin! Ever noticed what a clothespin does, if you use it on a blanket that's too thick? POP! Dirty blanket.

Okay, I gotta get to work.

Good luck, and remember, NO CLAMPING!!

16 comments:

Nicely dun said...

I LOVE YOU!

You always know how to 'splain things so that we can understand.

No more clothespin riding!

Sherry Sikstrom said...

GL, write a book would ya? you explain things so brilliantly

Cut-N-Jump said...

Very nicely put. I second the book, but I'm also happy with the blogging.

nccatnip said...

So I have been thinking about this since last night. I have had very limited instruction but clamping is the first thing I try to do when attempting to ride "properly". Wonder where that comes from and why it is such a common issue with riders?
And no SS in my mailbox today, dang it.

Padraigin_WA said...

love the clothespin visual!
Pop off that thick blanket. Boing!
goL, you are awesome!

horspoor said...

LOL! They clamp...start to bounce against the horse. Then they start to curl into a semi-fetal position. Now they are forward over the withers, soooooo they shorten the reins to balance or slow up the horse...and clamp/clutch harder. Then the final outcome...blame the horse. Stupid horse. Just makes you want to smack the rider, you know a little reality therapy.

I do love how you put things GL.

GoLightly said...

Saints be praised, HP is here!!

Hiya, wonder woman!

I am seventh. It's good luck:)

horspoor said...

Me? Working, working and working some more. How are you doing?

I'm supposed to have a Carrie lesson tomorrow on Maisa. Yeah, I haven't so much as sat on him in a month. The last time I did, we had no go. Had to get off re-establish the go on the ground, get back on and try again. It lasted a little while. He then stops, and even on a loose rein shoves his head down. Hurts my shoulder, so...pisses me off.

I got off after I got some forward and tied him to the trailer while I regrouped (both of us in time-out). While on him I had a moment of wanting to either float his teeth with the bit, or just flog the crap out of him with my boot heels. I opted to get some good, and just get off. lol

Any suggestions? Other than riding a greenie more than once a month. I guess I should be thankful he stops...rather than uncorks, huh?

horspoor said...

I'll try and check in tomorrow. Let you know if I get put on my head.

I don't think I'm telling anyone at the lesson that Maisa's sire just won the Sport Horse Nationals at GP. Cuz then they'll know for sure it's me, not the horse. Yeesh.

GoLightly said...

(roflmao)
"Other than riding a greenie more than once a month."

uh, yeah..

Ayup, ayup. It totally helps. Like my poor dogs. I have totally ruined Blaze's life. No, really, I have. I need to hire a dog whisperer. I've been shouting. It's so hard to watch yourself, knowing the mistakes you are making, make your dog the way she is..

snork. doing a greenie once a month. ..
Back muscles, HP. he doesn't got none. You know he HAS them. He's just amazed that you expect him to be himself, under your extreme weight. Which could be 23 grams, he'd still moan.
yes, please come back, HP. It's been quiet around here.
TOO quiet;)

sure wish you weren't on the other side of the planet.
useless wench, I is;)
Oh, there's a fat TB waiting for me, about, uh, yeah, 45 bazillion miles from here. My cousin is riding!
FINALLY, another lunatic, I mean..
HorseTypePerson in this mostly non-equine family.

horspoor said...

Top is just standing too. Without use he is reverting back to the horse that got dropped off, except he's fat now. Farrier comes Monday. Spending money on the 7 of them and their feet might light a fire under my A$%. I have this TG week off. Maybe I can get something accomplished if it would just quit raining.

horspoor said...

Oh...I've been doing the allergy shots on Maisa. It is amazing the change. Now he's chill, almost 'stoned' all time. Hence, the no forward. He'd rather hang out and chat, get in your space, lean on you, nibble at your clothing...basically drive you nuts as only a gelding can.

horspoor said...

I survived my Carrie lesson. Maisa survived. I'm sore, he's not. lol The right lead is an issue. He prefers the left. He can 'counter canter' pretty well (refuses to pick up the left) and when that is uncomfortable he can do a quick 180 to the left. lol

His canter is pretty nice though. Little fast at times...but feels pretty good.

horspoor said...

Oh...gotta fix the 13.

He was very pleased with himself at the end of the lesson...sweaty put happy boy. He wanted to visit with everyone. He's one of those horses that loves everybody. ol

nccatnip said...

Good job, HP!!!! I missed you.

Cut-N-Jump said...

HP is back????

Good to see ya girl!